【 Reach a Happy Ending 】
I stroked my healed jaw as I reunited with the notification window.
Who knew darkness and dampness could feel so welcome?
At least it was better than that freezing room where I'd been with Iris.
No need to look around.
The scenery would be familiar anyway.
The center of the tree-lined street again.
I stood for a moment, gazing up at the curtain of darkness covering the sky.
Rummaging through my pockets, I was grateful to find cheap cigarettes instead of cigars.
I pulled a cigarette from the pack and approached a tree.
I struck a match against the trunk to light it.
Watching the bark turn black, I savored the tobacco.
I'd missed this stale taste.
Not those ill-fitting cigars, but this mass-produced, rancid flavor like an old sewer.
I filled my lungs with bubbling tar.
I thought carefully while looking at the still-lingering notification window.
About what ending the original author might want for this story.
How could I achieve a happy ending?
Where was the fastest shortcut to happiness that I'd thought was lost forever?
My alcohol-pickled brain sparked.
Easy. I just need to endure Giselle's trial.
If kneeling won't work, I'll smash my head against the ground while begging and begging.
I'll cry and grovel and bark like a dog.
Giselle abandoning me was just an imitation of that childish novel.
Her love for me hadn't changed.
I understand the right direction for this story.
I've realized how 'Ain' can be happy.
The author probably wanted to see me groveling.
This sticky, tear-jerking romance must be their taste.
But.
I intend to reach the opposite of the right direction.
I'll try walking backward.
I'll destroy what you created with my own will.
It's fine to do it once.
I want to create catastrophe with my own hands.
Exhaling cigarette smoke, I headed toward Evergreen Manor.
I walked slowly through the green of the evergreens.
Soon, the cigarette went out in the rain that began falling again.
By the time I was chewing the filter-soaked cigarette, I reached the stairs where Giselle stood.
I could see her silhouette in clothes like black swan feathers.
I climbed to the top step without hesitation.
Meeting Giselle's red eyes without looking away for even a moment.
No need to call out to Giselle.
I wouldn't kneel in puddles either.
Giselle's pupils were trembling, however faintly.
Was it a change created through repeated regressions?
Or was it something I simply hadn't noticed before?
I grabbed the neck of Giselle, who had remained still until I reached right in front of her.
I spat out the bent cigarette butt and kissed the red lips on her porcelain face.
"Mmph..."
I thrust my tongue into Giselle's mouth as it opened in surprise.
Not the clumsy kisses we'd enjoyed since childhood, like birds pecking at feed.
A rough, voracious kiss that mixed saliva and mucous membranes.
Right, you wouldn't resist.
This was the proof of love Giselle had wanted.
Rainwater flowing down seeped into our mouths and noses.
Feeling Giselle's rapid breathing cooling quickly in the downpour, I pulled away.
Giselle smiled broadly and spoke in an ecstatic voice.
"Ain, you've finally come back to me."
This idiot seemed to think I'd finally overcome the trial she'd imposed.
She'd think I'd figured out her intentions that could never be known without asking.
What words would shatter Giselle's fantasy?
To crumble the tower she'd built like a sandcastle?
I recalled our last conversation from my previous life.
"Giselle, do you dream of me?"
Giselle nodded and answered.
"As I thought, our souls must be connected. You understand.
I always dream of you these days, Ain."
Unlike the first cycle, I remembered her coming to my house first.
And Iris dismissing faint memories of past lives as dreams.
"In those dreams, what do I look like?"
The joy in Giselle's expression froze instantly.
Seeing that face, I was certain I'd hit the mark.
"You dreamed of me dying."
"Ain won't die and leave me. It's just a dream."
"You were anxious."
She who had maintained cold silence when I begged her to say anything.
From the next life, she came to me first with a book containing reasons.
She must have been afraid I'd die.
Like Iris.
That's why she constantly came and went where I was.
—Slap
I struck Giselle's right cheek.
Between her rain-soaked, storm-cloud-like hair, I saw eyes filled with confusion.
No need to prepare lengthy words like last time.
She wouldn't understand no matter how much I explained.
I just needed to plant a swarm of bees in her flower garden.
The starting point was violence.
"I don't love you anymore."
"That's a lie, Ain. I can see right through..."
—Slap
I struck the same spot again.
Giselle clutched her cheek, now the same color as snow.
I bent slightly to meet her eye level.
"It hurts, Ain."
"Right. I hit you so it would hurt.
Like how I hurt when you threw away the ring.
I want you to hurt too, Giselle."
I grabbed Giselle's braided side hair tightly.
I smiled pitifully while looking at her shrinking pupils.
My tongue became a serpent's.
"How would you feel if I died?"
"...Ain won't die and leave me."
Giselle muttered like an incantation.
"Well, I'm planning to die."
"That's a lie, Ain. Stop lying."
"I think you said your soul would shatter if you lost me, right?"
"I was just expressing my love for you poetically."
I lifted Giselle by her hair.
The irises surrounded by white trembled even more violently.
"Giselle. I'm going to die and leave you alone.
I'll shatter your soul like mine.
I'll die miserably after breaking off our love so you can't wait.
I'll meet an end more terrible and vicious than in your dreams."
"Ain couldn't die and leave me. Never..."
"Knife. Chest. Wrist. Nun. Medicine. Iris. Jaw."
I fired the second loaded bullet.
I listed words that could trigger memories of past lives.
Nothing special.
I'd gotten the idea from watching Iris struggle with confusion when I pressed her about memories.
Seeing Giselle slowly shake her head, it seemed I'd guessed right.
I brought my twisted lips closer to her.
"Why? You said Ain won't die. Something's coming back to you."
By now she must be suffering a headache trying to deny memories that shouldn't exist.
I released Giselle's hair.
I pulled out a cigarette that wasn't yet wet and put it in my mouth.
"Will you light it for me?"
But Giselle just stared blankly at the ground.
I tucked the matchbox between my body and elbow and lit it myself.
After striking several times, I held the cigarette to the barely-sparked flame.
I blew smoke toward Giselle's face and said.
"Do you still think I love you?"
Giselle looked up at me with an expression I'd never seen before.
Her doll-like features looked cracked.
"Can't you imagine me loving someone other than you?"
No answer.
Giselle's rain-soaked hair reminded me of rags.
I continued speaking.
"Right. Just as you suspect. I find you repulsive.
I hate you enough to want to kill you right now."
So she could hear clearly even in the torrential rain.
So I could thoroughly tear up the flower garden Giselle had carefully cultivated.
I chose my words carefully and deliberately.
"But there's good news too, Giselle. I'll give you a chance, repulsive as you are."
Giselle's lips twitched as if she had something to say.
"Then... the reenactment... the humiliation..."
"Ah, that childish bullshit isn't necessary.
Let's throw away all that crap about trials and whatever."
Giselle closed her mouth again.
"There's something I want to try. Help me."
I stroked her still-red right cheek.
"Cater to me so I can love you again.
Then, who knows? Maybe our shattered souls will reconnect."
"...Really, Ain?"
As if.
From my scrotum to your womb.
From your cradle to my grave.
Nothing will be connected.
"Of course. It's up to you.
So, can I expect your devotion, Giselle?"
Giselle's expression gradually relaxed.
As if expecting my impossible promise.
"Can I receive that kiss we just had again?"
After taking a deep drag, I kissed Giselle once more.
Pushing the smoke I held along with my tongue into Giselle's throat.
I didn't wipe what flowed from her closed eyes.
Giselle tried desperately to swallow the harsh smoke.
Without resistance, she wrapped her arms around my waist as if happy.
I licked Giselle's lips, wounded from biting, then pushed her away from my body.
The fishy iron taste remaining on my tongue was unpleasant.
Giselle spoke quietly with a faint smile.
Shedding hot tears from one eye on her pale body.
"I'll do my best, Ain."
The detonator was complete.
I'd accumulated enough motivation to follow through from past cycles.
"Shall we arrange a place to stay first?
Your palace-like manor must still have a room for me."
"Yes, Ain. I'll prepare it."
I swatted away Giselle's hand reaching for me and walked together.
The butler running toward Giselle with an umbrella stopped when he saw me.
"Young Lady? That person is..."
I kicked the butler who reminded me of annoying memories.
Giselle didn't even glance at the butler collapsed and clutching his abdomen.
At the manor's entrance, I looked at the lit windows and sepia-colored brick walls.
I suddenly recalled my ghost-like empty house.
The broken mirror in the bathroom and the rotted planks in the ceiling.
What's lost can't be recovered.
What's broken can never be fixed.
But grinding it thoroughly into powder without leaving a trace—that I can do.
Look forward to it, Giselle, Iris.
And all the family members and constituents as well.
To everyone who carved indelible scars into my life.
I'll bestow the greatest gift you'll never forget even in death.
I'll prepare a deep and profound tragedy.