Anger… was it?
*No.*
It wasn't that.
She had felt anger so rarely in her life that the memory of it was all the more precise.
Heart racing, vision narrowing to a point.
Judgment faltering, every nerve flooding upward into the mind.
The hottest of all emotions—one a mage, who must remain rational and cold in any situation, could not afford to carry.
Elline reached back for the last time she had felt anger.
The moment Sereen had tried to provoke her, using Rutess as leverage.
The moment she had placed her hand on Rutess's arm, intending harm.
She felt none of that now. Her mind was calm. Clear. Her pulse, quiet.
She could hear the insects in the grass. She could feel the occasional brush of wind against her skin.
Then what…
*What is this feeling.*
She looked ahead.
Rutess was lying flat on the shattered training ground, covered in dust and grime.
"Oh, look—the moon."
He was gazing up at the sky with a half-dazed smile, but his eyes were focused.
After lunch, she had been hurling magic at him without restraint until sundown.
By the time the sun had set and the moon had risen, Elline's training session was over.
"Rutess."
"Mm… yeah?"
He flinched. Elline bit the inside of her lip.
*…*
She walked over slowly and dropped down beside him, just as she had the night before—knees together, watching him.
His face was caked with dust. She couldn't quite find the words, but she gathered herself and opened her mouth.
"I'm sorry."
"…Out of nowhere?"
She was sorry.
It was a feeling she had never experienced before, and her inexperience in handling it had made her push far beyond what was necessary.
He hadn't done anything wrong.
"Yes."
"No, it's fine. A little sore, but."
Rutess forced a smile and began brushing the dirt off himself.
Why had this unnameable feeling surfaced?
Why had she poured magic into him so relentlessly, without reason or limit?
She had met him in the visiting room and walked away.
He had run into Rui, exchanged greetings, talked with her.
*…Rui.*
Rui, who always smiled with unclouded brightness. Who was endlessly positive.
That spotless smile, that drive to better herself—Rui was one of the few students whose name Elline actually knew.
Their conversation had been easy.
Rutess had spoken to her the way he would speak to any friend, without any particular feeling. Rui had simply smiled.
That was all.
And yet something had risen from a corner of her chest.
*…*
She knew Rutess was uncomfortable around her.
Even when he had tried to tell her the truth, she was the one who had said she wasn't ready to hear it yet.
Because she had wanted him to tell her when he could face himself honestly.
But was that truly all of it?
Her emotional expression was blunt. She had no gift for clever words. She couldn't smile the way Rui did—open and unclouded.
There might have been things she didn't even realize were making him uncomfortable.
Still…
*For me, too.*
I wish he would smile that easily for me, too…
"Elline."
"…Yes."
"Thank you. For everything."
He was thanking her.
For what, exactly?
She had simply lost control of a feeling she didn't understand and let it spill out.
"…Why?"
"Just—you've been here with me for two whole days, helping me out. Today was… a bit rough, but still."
He stretched out his stiff body and slowly settled beside her.
"No, I… went too far."
"I didn't die, though."
"…"
A poor joke.
The residue of mana shimmered in the air, and a sharp, acrid smell rose from between the broken marble slabs—but neither Rutess nor Elline said anything.
A clear night sky.
Bright moonlight, and the stars arranged around it, stitching a river of light across the ceiling of the world.
"Hey."
"Mm."
"Want me to show you something interesting?"
*Something interesting.*
At those words, Elline turned to look—and saw Rutess raise a trembling hand, unsteady on his feet, and begin compressing mana.
A faint light flickered unstably, then formed a small sphere.
The sphere swelled and wobbled like a water droplet, then burst apart in a scatter of light.
*Mana Compression.*
Mana Compression—something Elline had drilled countless times as a child.
It was novel to see it again after so long, but interesting? She didn't feel that.
Or perhaps she simply couldn't feel it.
*…*
Elline considered this carefully.
Wondering, perhaps, whether she was the one who couldn't feel the small things—things like this.
She gazed steadily at his palm.
"Elline, don't look at my hand—look above it."
She lifted her eyes.
The drifting lights weren't scattering aimlessly. They were flying somewhere.
Toward the sky.
They vanished before getting far, of course.
"Did you see where those lights just disappeared?"
"I did."
Three to the upper right, two to the left, one to the right of the moon, and one at the brightest star.
"Try connecting them."
Elline nodded and began, slowly, to trace the lines.
Following the points she had memorized precisely, she connected them one by one—and between the stars that had seemed scattered without pattern, a single shape began to emerge.
The brightest star: the tip of a blade.
The lines connecting the rest: the form of a sword.
*That's…*
She had learned about this once, in a general studies class.
Every star that illuminates the world is light from a distant place—but also a vast medium that records the memory of the past.
And they were called this:
Constellations, or star-patterns.
It had nothing to do with magic, so she hadn't studied it deeply—but she remembered, at least, that they held countless heroic tales and curious stories.
"That's the constellation of Sword Saint Dronica. They say he was a great commander who stood at the side of the founding emperor before magic was put to practical use, and helped lay the foundations of the empire."
Stars were reflected in Rutess's eyes.
"…"
And he began to tell the story of a star.
The story of one Sword Saint.
A man who had lost everything in a brutal civil war long ago.
Who had taken up his sword and risen, and together with the young founding emperor, brought the continent to order.
People honored his greatness, called him the Sword Saint, and carved his memory into the sky forever.
It was one person's epic—one she would never have heard if not for Rutess.
Like water soaking into dry earth, the heroic tale she hadn't heard in so long seeped into Elline's heart.
"…And so, they say that on the day he closed his eyes, those stars began to shine especially bright."
By the time the story ended, Elline had drifted into it entirely, her gaze resting on the stars overhead.
The world was wide.
There were so many stories in it.
*I…*
Even if a story were written about her someday, it would be a truly dull one.
Because the Mage Tower had already been decided.
Already decided…
*…*
Clunk—
The training ground lights came on, and the broken marble slabs began to rattle as the restoration process started.
When the training ground's repair magic activated, it meant the facility was closing.
"Shall we go?"
He stood up.
His body seemed to have recovered somewhat—he rose with a slight wobble, stretched his back, and a series of cracks rang out.
"Rutess."
"Mm."
…
She could see he was in pain. But was it all right to be a little selfish?
…No, it was fine.
*We're a couple.*
It didn't matter.
Elline spread both hands open.
Rutess startled at the sight—then, when he felt no mana flowing, his expression relaxed with relief.
"Carry me."
"…?"
"My legs are tired."
A complete lie.
Anyone could see she was perfectly fine—where did she get off lying like that…
Her expression was as unreadable as ever.
She stood motionless, watching him.
*If I refuse, she's not going to move.*
"I'm in a lot of pain, you know."
"I don't care."
He said he was in pain, and she said she didn't care.
Her way of speaking was genuinely difficult to navigate.
But either way, if they got caught during inspection, he'd earn demerits—or if luck wasn't on his side, he might even catch a loving wallop from Yulian.
And besides.
*Right, Elline wants this.*
She had given up her time for him. What reason was there to refuse?
It wasn't even a difficult request. Just a piggyback ride.
He'd held her hand… and she'd even kissed him on the cheek. Surely carrying her on his back was within the realm of possibility.
*Though I'm still not used to the cheek kiss.*
"…Fine. Okay."
He walked across the rattling marble and turned his back to her.
He bent his knees and offered her his back, angled so she could climb on comfortably.
"Just lean against me."
Come to think of it, the last person he'd carried had been Alfred.
Before leaving for the academy, Alfred had said he wanted to climb a mountain, and Rutess had carried him up. The memory surfaced.
*He'll be all right.*
He heard Elline's quiet footsteps, then they stopped just behind him.
Thud—
A soft weight settled against his back.
At the same moment, Elline's hair brushed his ear and came to rest on his shoulder, and her scent reached him, deep and close.
*Oh.*
There was one thing he hadn't accounted for.
He had held her hand. He had received that sudden kiss on the cheek. But—
Now that he thought about it, they had never been in contact over this much surface area before.
It was nothing like carrying Alfred.
He had grown used to the rough, bark-like texture of someone weathered by years—
But Elline was soft. And… yielding…
*No. Stop thinking about it.*
He barely managed to rein in his thoughts.
"…Ready?"
"Yes."
He felt her shift her full weight against him, the load settling in.
*…*
As always.
His heart began to beat faster.
With trembling hands, he slowly gathered her legs around him and stood.
*She's light.*
Compared to the bales of hay he had hauled around the estate—Elline was light enough to make the comparison absurd.
And—
*…Honestly.*
He felt like he might lose his mind.
The one saving grace was that every nerve in his body had converged on this single point, and all the aching pain had vanished entirely.
"…Rutess."
Her breath came from just behind him, and goosebumps rose along his skin.
"Yeah. Yeah. Yeah?"
"Are you all right?"
No, I think I might die.
He would have cast a spell right then and there if there were any magic that could carry him to his destination on autopilot.
Whether she knew what was going through his mind or not, she unwound the arm draped over his shoulder and wrapped it around to the front, taking both his hands in hers.
Wow, was she planning to strangle him with that?
*Please, go ahead.*
"Sh—shall we go?"
"Yes."
Slowly, carefully, he began to move.
With every step, his heart lurched.
Trudge. Trudge.
As it always did, time passed—and the dizzying sensation of those first moments gradually became something he could bear.
Something he had thought about whenever he carried someone.
The fact that two heartbeats could be heard at once as he walked—it was strangely, inexplicably moving.
Was Elline aware of it too?
"Rutess."
"….What?"
"The constellation story was interesting."
"Was it?"
She hadn't looked it, but if she said it was interesting, he was glad.
And then—
Softly—
Elline leaned close and whispered in his ear.
"Tell me another one next time."
…
"Okay."
He barely managed to collect himself and nodded, and Elline let out a quiet, satisfied breath—
And released her tension, letting her weight rest fully against his back.
Silence.
The sound of insects in the grass, and now and then, distant voices.
The academy buildings still had their lights on, and he could see them through the dark.
Elline's faint breathing drifted down from behind him, flowing along his back and down to the nape of his neck.
He couldn't tell if she was asleep or lost in thought.
*It was interesting.*
She had said it was interesting. That she wanted to hear more.
It was a first.
Both telling someone a story like this, and having someone say they found it interesting.
His friends would probably yawn and make faces at something this slow-paced—he'd never even started. And with his family, there had never been time to talk.
Next time.
If she wanted to hear it, he wanted to tell her again.
The night walk back to the dormitory.
As if matching the quiet rhythm of Elline's pulse—
His heart began to beat slowly.